JLB Episode 67 – The Babysitter Club Massacre

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In this episode, we are broadcasting from the inside of a closet! There is a murdering child afoot and while hiding we decide to pass the time, and what better way to do that then loudly recording an episode of JLB! But seriously folks, we are in severe danger here. Anyway, we talk shit about other podcasts and their sniffle edits and then we join a babysitter club. Joan’s kid goes off the rails and plants clever lego traps and kills with menacing garden shears. Josh’s childhood teddy bear who was unsatisfied with his penis size decides to go off on an epic adventure comparing dongs. While in the closet we meet an old chain smoking big nose curmudgeon named Barbara who believes hard work, a pack of smokes, and shot of whisky will solve the world’s problems.

Fashion update: Grey wool is in this year!

Don’t forget you can also give us a call and leave a voice mail and we’ll play it on the next episode! Call us at 813-551-ANUS. That’s 813-551-2687!

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JLB Episode 66 – Opposites Attract……Murder!

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In this scary episode of JLB, (while watching a Paula Abdul video) we are visited by MC Skat Kat with a dire message about the cartoon world and how it is under attack by a menacing serial killer, known only as Christopher Robin. While shit is going down in 100 Acre Wood, he mistakes our podcast for an award winning radio talk show to ask for help and get the word out. After rambling on about how Abdul’s video paid for his grad school he recounts the terror caused by Robins. Killing cartoon notables such as Bugs Bunny, Porky Pig, and Popeye the opium laced weed dealer. Josh then gets hung up on Jessica Rabbit’s boobs and inter-species love connection before closing things out and getting MC back home. So tune in for all this and more! Remember folks, cartoon cat dick can fill cavities.

Don’t forget you can also give us a call and leave a voice mail and we’ll play it on the next episode! Call us at 813-551-ANUS. That’s 813-551-2687!

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JLB Episode 65 – The Ford Expedition to the Birdmuta Triangle

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In this episode, we ramble on about some old fashion God related curse words and then treat our buffer fans to the many things Jill doesn’t understand. It’s not a club until the cops shut ya down. We then jib-jab about the ill fated Ford Francis Bacon, which was a car that used a bacon cooker to prevent you from falling asleep at the wheel. Jill tracked down balding middle aged men because she is the karma chameleon. Josh takes up the lost art of navigating and takes Jill on a misguided expedition to Birdmuta, where we get into our sexy mysterious Hot Topics. It’s all moistened clam ham and classic bear smackdowns from here folks, so tune in now ya bunch of buffers and find out!

This episode was sponsored by Dick Jam. You can go to dickjam.biz and enter the code BirdMuta to get %10 off your first tube of DickJam.

Don’t forget you can also give us a call and leave a voice mail and we’ll play it on the next episode! Call us at 813-551-ANUS. That’s 813-551-2687!

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JLB Episode 64 – Tech Reviews, Self Rape, and The Snapchat Dick Pic Method

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In this episode, Jill opens with a brief impromptu interview (via Snapchat) with presidential hopeful, Scat Mayor. Unfortunately, he doesn’t have his translator with him so she has absolutely no idea what he is talking about. Nevertheless, Jill charges on with thought provoking questions about reaching the millennials and the Snapchat dick pic method. Josh walks in from taking a humongous shit and finds Jill already doing the podcast without him and then she rambles on about wanting to join a vape club to represent Vape Nation. Should it be broadcast on Spanish ESPN? Damn straight! We then get on a little hashtag jib jab before Josh ruins our lives with a shit story about yet another club he has joined. Don’t worry, this one is actually relevant! Lets just say it has a little something to do with pokeballin’ and self rape *wink*. We then close things out by sharing a short audio clip from our new Youtube sponsor, Ultimate Tech Reviews Unlimited with Larry, where he does amazing tech reviews and his wife Barbara does dollar tree art reviews, they’re great!

Don’t forget you can also give us a call and leave a voice mail and we’ll play it on the next episode! Call us at 813-551-ANUS. That’s 813-551-2687!

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JLB Episode 63 – Foxes Buttholes and The Ham Tax

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In this episode, we talk about agile foxes, shitty bus driver wages, neckbeard things, and the outrageous ham tax of 1863. We have a heated discussion about North Carolina’s many overrun fox farms and the silly practice of checking foxes buttholes for polyps. Jill may not know what a neckbeard is, but you can pretty much convince her to eat any garbage food with some slick advertisements. Which leads us into a brief Champion Diet jib jab before completely degrading our intern, K-Bone. We then go right into our “Hot Topics” about Jill’s swift decision to transition into a fox, well a chinese fox to be exact! Will she be the best chinese fox ping pong player of all time? Will she create a hot new foxtract dance move? These questions and more in this exciting episode! We then close out the show with a fascinating Noel Fielding update.

This episode is proudly sponsored by Gary’s Razors!

Don’t forget you can also give us a call and leave a voice mail and we’ll play it on the next episode! Call us at 813-551-ANUS. That’s 813-551-2687!

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JLB Episode 62 – Big Black Horse and The Tickle Team

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In this episode, we watch just the tip of a documentary trailer called “Tickled” and become completely engrossed in the competitive sport of tickling. We discuss our new tickle team called “Tickle The Pickle” or TTP for short and how we are getting in on the ground floor of this billion dollar underground tickle ring industry. We briefly talk about JT’s ramen noodle hair, Sexy Howie D, and another new club Josh was invited to that involves dill pickles and buttholes. Ricola is the polish word for toe fuck and the numero uno way to win a tickling match is doggystyle. We then get into our very time sensitive Hot Topics about KT Tunstall and her biggest hit in 2000 something, “Black Horse and The Cherry Tree”. We go over the lyrics of the song with a fine tooth comb and discover that they are subtle clues that lead to her whereabouts, she’s been missing since. We then receive an unexpected and scary call from Betty, an adamant follower of the “Jill 4 Jesus” show.

Just a note here, Josh has a new album coming out soon called “Gape Hole” so you’re gonna want to pick that up.

Don’t forget you can also give us a call and leave a voice mail and we’ll play it on the next episode! Call us at 813-551-ANUS. That’s 813-551-2687!

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JLB Episode 61 – Jill 4 Jesus Christ Line Tuesday!

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In this episode, we broadcast the audio of a new TV show featuring Reverend AppleBottom called, Jill 4 Jesus! Since today is Christ Line Tuesday, we take a few calls from folk who are desperately seeking some Godly advice from our divine host, Jill. We hear from a blessed woman who has a problem with her teenage son, a woman who is struggling with an addiction, and many more that require righteous advice. We then talk about the floods in WV and whether or not the movie “The Exorcist” played a part in it. Counselors are agents of the devil and then the venerable Reverend AppleBottom talks briefly about his street preaching schedule. The only true way to meet the Lord is to be dead and so we end the show with a radio baptism starring the one and only, Dr. Ben Carson.

Remember folks, if Jesus was pregnant, he would keep that baby.

Don’t forget you can also give us a call and leave a voice mail and we’ll play it on the next episode! Call us at 813-551-ANUS. That’s 813-551-2687!

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JLB Episode 60 – Kenny The Intern and Oiled Duck

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In this episode our very own intern, Kenny, joins us in the studio to have a frank discussion about his performance. Unfortunately, he had to bring a brat kid named Sam that he is babysitting, while “its” mom parties just three doors down the street. After Josh completely tears into Kenny’s ass, and I mean really gets up in there about his many duty failures here at JLB, Sam annoyingly reminds us that children are not precious little creatures that need to be cherished; This one needs discipline dammit! But it’s not all bad, because Sam gleefully informs us of all the atrocities our dear K-Bone may or may not have committed. You can’t trust kids, but you might be able to trust one who creeps and follows Kenny around constantly. So tune in to hear discussions on things like shit mud pies being fed to dogs, devil twins, Michael Jordan cutouts, scrapple, and so much more!

Don’t forget you can also give us a call and leave a voice mail and we’ll play it on the next episode! Call us at 813-551-ANUS. That’s 813-551-2687!

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JLB Episode 59 – Polar Bear Crisis 2016!

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We’re back!!! We’ve been having some technical problems, so we appreciate you folks for bearing with us through this difficult time in our lives.

In this episode we go on about this and that, tit for tat, bait for bat, frog foie gras, and other random things to peak your nips. Josh tried to make a baby with his computer at an attempt to get it working right, but the result was grilled shard marks in the private area. We go on and on about old times, parties, and a weird dancing man with glow sticks and large dangerous eyes. We do some shout outs, Josh tells us about yet another club he has joined and then the immediate failing of said club after his entry. We do our very first “Cold Topics” about the Polar Bear Crisis 2016! It’s a real travesty and probably the most important issue of our lifetime, so tune in to find out!

Don’t forget to keep Curtis’s name in your mouth.

Don’t forget you can also give us a call and leave a voice mail and we’ll play it on the next episode! Call us at 813-551-ANUS. That’s 813-551-2687!

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JLB Episode 58 – Peter Pan and The Supple Toes

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In this episode, we meet the mastermind behind the world’s most exquisite and delicious peanut butter spread, Peter Pan from Peter Pan Peanut Butter. But first, we kick things off with a new sponsor, Zata-Iran’s (made in Iran), If it’s rice then it’s probably not Zata-Iran’s or rice. We briefly talk about beach body big titties before jumping into our main interview with the hobgoblin himself, Peter Pan. As with most things in our lives, if we see something or someone strange we tend to kidnap it and question it relentlessly while letting the fear fuel our blind anger; and that’s exactly what we did when we saw this simple goblin like creature trying to snatch little lost boys. As Jill leaves the room to take a humongous shit Josh unties the little bastard and proceeds to drill him……with questions, ya bunch of big noses. We talk about it’s nut process, peanut allergies, Magicians Guild, Full House, Michael Jackson, supple toes, and so much more! So tune in and let the soothing sounds of Peter Pan’s creepy ass voice manipulate and lull you, into slavery.

Don’t forget you can also give us a call and leave a voice mail and we’ll play it on the next episode! Call us at 813-551-ANUS. That’s 813-551-2687!

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